I try to live in the moment and take in so many remarkable things. I just have to pause, once in a while and reflect. As I do so I'm kind of amazed at those things that just happen. No plan, Just part of being present.
"Great to have you in my life." Did she just say that? Or is it a random message that has no meaning. It makes me smile nevertheless. There is no denying that we enjoy each other's company. She's more cautious and careful. I have always been confident that things will work out for the best. (Mostly, that has been the truth for me in my charmed life.)
She said she did not want to get married again. Nine years of divorced life, I guess, makes you want to embrace your independence. Clearly she has made herself indespensible to her four children and those precious grandchildren. In another conversation she said that she never wanted to be a burden in her old age, suggesting that mortality into the eighties might not be worth living. That's when I suggested we get married on her 81st birthday. That proposal has the net effect of "tabling" the agenda item but has the impact of keeping the affection real and fanning the flames a bit. Then, in a card that arrived in my mailbox she suggested she MIGHT marry me on her 81st birthday. (Still not accepting my proposal with a resounding YES but top of mind and kind of magical nevertheless.) So that's on the table for now. I suggested we try not to overthink it.
I never expected to be a widow. My wife of 41+ years passed nearly two years ago (2/3/2022). During the holiday season there are hundreds of little things that remind me of how lucky we were. We have two remarkable grown children and they each have boys living their best lives at 7 and 7 1/2 years of age. They remind me that there is so much to be joyful about in the here and now.
I am fortunate to havc been able to get reconnected with someone who brings me back in time. She was my prom date nearly fifty years ago! In November, we went to the theater together to see a play by Bob Dylan (Girl from the North Country, Duluth, Minn. 1934) that wrapped a story around his songs, the lyrics of one song became the message for my holiday greeting card. May you stay forever young.
Stay you. Love, me.
